Shmorgishborg

So I'm averaging about five posts a month. I think I need to maybe make a resolution to get at least 10 posts or so out there to be considered a blogger. I duno. Honestly, at the end of the day, I'm really okay with whatever and however it turns out, but sometimes I feel like if I don't keep up, it defines my reliability or credibility or something.

Excuses, excuses.
Anyway, aside from that, I have been dealing with and working through some things & stuff over the last several weeks, much of which involves processing through some broken, past, childhood ...and adult ...experiences. I think I properly excused myself over the last few months to process it all offline in a safe community {love you guys!!} rather than gushing it all on here.  For now, it's probably better this way, trust me.

Summertime!
In the meantime, our family of four has been embracing the summer as best as we can. Albeit it’s been chock full of crazie at times, there are definitely some moments that have been sweet and savory.  I mean, honestly it is no different than any other season, except that I am sporting a deeper tan than I have ever been able to in a while.  Good times.

The Home Office
J and I are finally tackling our home office and it is starting to take shape (J is probably more excited than me; he's been looking forward to a fully functional home office for quite some time). I like getting my hands dirty at home and I enjoy that delicious feeling of productivity and accomplishment at the end of a hard working day. Engaging in this activity together is simply icing on the cake.

Backyard 
We have some wasps invading our backyard space, so I'm waiting for the exterminator (or 'terminator' as Cj refers to them) to come in and do what they do. I hope to play a little back there, with the boys of course, but more so with function and design.  I have been lusting over some oasis-like-backyards and coveting my own. I will receive an immense amount of satisfaction once my herbs getting planted. Yes, yes, I understand the summer is half over. I still want to plant them.

Cj
Ahh, my loving 3 year old (going on 12) is at a darling stage with his "excuse me?"'s and "may I go potty?" {Yes, the potty.  It's happened!  I know, I'm excited about it too.} Anyway, I can't help but chuckle or just stop and stare at him sometimes. I often wonder how long it will last and grieve a bit if I start to dwell on a future that has yet to happen. Sometimes it takes me a while before I can shake it off and figure out ways to treasure the now.

Tj
Finally making his place in the world and piecing together some words, or maybe phrases… or really at the very least just use one or two in context like “paaish” (please) and “taa-shu” (thank you). "Nooo" is always readily accessible and “ahh whaa daaiiee” (I want daddy) is his favorite, especially when he sees me greet him in the morning.  Thanks son. I appreciate the love.

The most recent episode involved this little guy somehow taking down a gallon of extra virgin olive oil (it wasn't full) and then proceeding to pour it all over himself and the carpet while I was in the kitchen cooking.
.:: Sigh::.  I think I just have to expect this kind of crazie with two toddler boys.  When I finally found him and all the evidence on and surrounding him, I honestly wasn’t even shocked. I pretty much said “yup, thaaat’s about right” and just got straight to cleaning.  I had to take a picture; he was just down right proud with himself (and that dimple is so darn charming).

Shows how far I’ve come from cherishing a spic and span house to embracing the spots and stains.

Okay probably not embracing it, per se. Learning to live with and accept (for now) is a better way of putting it.

wordless wednesday {too}

...i had to post...

1

my travie! 

As luck would have it...

So my little guy had to go into the doctor on friday morning because he had a double ear infection. He had been tugging at his ear for over a week, but there was no fever or congestion and he was showing signs of teething, so I just assumed that he was getting his first tooth. Anyway, as luck would have it, the poor guy has an infection in both ears :( {AND he's teething}.

Poor guy.

Anyway, this is the first sick appointment we had to make for Tj, so it was kinda nice to see that he had been cold-free during the last 7 to 8 months. But this thursday, we are planning to be in florida for a wedding for a very good friend of ours {we just were at one on Saturday for my cousin...and we have more to come. It's wedding season folks}. In any case, we planned to have the kids stay with Jus' parents so that we could have a mini vaca while there, and I'm hoping they get better by then so that we can have a worry free weekend {for them and for us}.

Hopefully, he'll go back to his cold-free state after we kick this one. But we'll see. I heard the mosquitos are going to be crazie this summer {I already have at least 4 mosquito bites since yesterday}.

:: sigh ::

Go away mosquitos. We don't need any weird flu-like-plagues being spread around this summer

So hello again.

So I took a break from blogging and most things social-media related ...for a whole week. I just needed some time off to focus and also had some business type items to tie up, and as a result, I got to spend a little more time with the boys. Tj started sitting up on his own and so I've been a little more conscious of him since he is only now starting to master it.  Now that he is, Cj is just too excited for words. I feel like he thinks that this "brother" of his is finally a person and not just this blob of mass lying there.

Tj also found his lungs this weekend. Now he really lets me know when he isn't happy about something and it has completely caught me off guard. Where did my little quiet, innocent little baby go? He's growing up.

::Sigh::

But on the other hand, it's so fun to watch them interact more. That just keeps increasing each day. I can't wait to see them having mini-convos on the side....well until they are talking about me =)

It's true. I'm a mom.

So I don't know what it is but for some reason I just have not been able to get away from the sweetness and all the baby-like beauty of my secondborn. It just has been one of those days where I have been absolutely caught up by everything that is Travis. I just cannot get enough of him. First of all, I just need to put it out there: the little guy simply lights up whenever he sees me walk into the room. I mean, you can actually see it: his smile just grows so large and becomes so bright and he just stares and adores and I. Love. It.  I love that I am his world right now, because I know that this will be just for a season; before long he will be too busy crawling and exploring and trying his best to be like his older brother or daddy, so for the moment, I am just embracing every little bit of it. From the way he holds my hands to the way his eyebrows burrow in intense concentration as his investigates his newest toy to the way he is so absolutely captivated by his brother. He is starting to interact so much more when Colin laughs with him or talks to him and Cj is absolutely amused by this. He's just figuring out new ways to get his little brother to laugh again, or even what it is that he can protect Tj from. It's been so amazing to see how he takes on the big brother role already and rushes over to Tj's side to soothe and say that it's going to be alright {when in reality Cj is just running away from his source of fear while Tj is trying to figure out how to get closer to the action}.

In anycase, it amazes me in these moments that I AM actually a mom. In some ways, I cannot remember a time before children, but then in others, I'm floored by the fact that this baby attached to my hip or that toddler clinging to my leg are actually mine. My boys. I can't help but think, "who thought that was a good idea?" because, really? Do you know me? Seriously. Me...a mom? Some people, I feel, were born maternal. I am not quite sure I was. Well, I guess most people see and think of me as a mom today, but when I sit down at night and I still look back at the entirety of my day and have no idea how it all got figured out. But it happens, and I can't help but think God is truly so good. I guess that's what it all goes to display in the end, and that truth is really pretty cool.

In any case, it all changes so quickly and I just want to make sure I can remember and be reminded of these moments of glory on those days that I just want to pull my hair out.  SOo, I'm going to continue enjoying the scent of 'baby' on Tj {or rather, his baby shampoo} and watch him blow those raspberries at his daddy and smile at the drooly kisses he leaves on his older brother. I've been given a pretty other-wordly privilege to do so, and I would rather not spend my time or energy on anything less.

Wordless Wednesday

{Travis and Colin}

{Travis' toy of choice and Colin's toy of choice}

{Colin got a hold of the camera}

Second Child Syndrome

Oh the second-handed treatment. Second borns just get the short hand of the stick, and the parental guilt can be overwhelming. Try as I might, I just can't keep up...

See what had happened was....
My husband, Justin, is a second born. When we found out about Travis, his only wish was that we would love him and treat him exactly the same way we did/ would with Colin. I get that. I mean, I may be a first born, but I remember the complaints my brother would give about being "Sherry's brother" {though that has COMPLETELY flipped now to me being "Mikey's sister} or even Jus' infamous story that there remain albums and albums of his older brother and yet a little envelope tucked on the bottom shelf with the words "Justin - birth to present" written on the front {of course many of you know him and his stories, and they are fully saturated with exaggeration} In any case, we both really wanted to make sure he would get the same pictures and the same attention and love we provided Colin.

Unfortunately, he came in second which means, he's second to arrive at everything else, well at least for a while. Oh don't get me wrong, we LOVE him {have you seen the little guy? I mean, how could we not?!} but there just has been another who has already captivated us in all things 'new'. What, Travis is gonna roll over? Been there. Wait he's starting to sit up on his own? Yah, show me something we haven't seen already. He's about to eat with a spoon? Well, guess who just started eating with a fork?

And to be honest, our first born is still young enough that there are still "firsts" still happening with him.

Poor Travis.

However, Jus {in all his infinite wisdom} did voice a important reminder about just how much we get to enjoy all those "firsts" again. Those special moments which HAD come and gone with Colin. We get baby feet again. There are those heart-melting smiles showcasing just how happy he is to be alive.  Everything is so new and exciting to him. His laughs. Dirty diapers are just not as nasty.

 ...and he's just the sweetest thing.

It'll be a wonderful "new" experience for both my husband and I just to see who these little men become and in the process, seeing each of them for who they are and appreciating them in that.  Travis is already showing how different he is from his brother and I'm so excited to see what comes next.

Second born DOES not mean second best and I love that.

{see, Jus, you are just as cool as me!}